#2,330: Gods of Egypt

Assassin's Creed - ★☆☆☆☆
I'm happy for Michael Fassbender and his new boat. I thought this was reasonably well directed, in that I generally could tell what was happening on screen, but badly written, in as much as I never had any idea what was going on in the movie.

Silence - ★★★☆☆
It may well be the point, but this is a tough movie to love. It sure doesn't help that it's being sold as a kind of 'men on a (ahem) mission' adventure, but I guess no one's going to line up for 'a catalog of incessant cruelty!'

JFK - ★★★★☆
Welp, I'm convinced!

Costner is good in his role as the engine of the thin veneer of plot Oliver Stone wraps around all of the 'evidence' he wants to lay out. Also, I've heard the John Williams theme to JFK for years, but the film itself turns those snares into something sinister...

Gods of Egypt - ½☆☆☆☆
It seems like right now everyone is going nuts for Hidden Figures. And while Hidden Figures is fine, and I'm glad we found out about those women and their story, it's not a great movie. I mean, it's not a Great Movie. It's good, there's nothing wrong with it. I just think that the average person going crazy for it doesn't see that many movies.

Likewise, when someone says that Batman v Superman is the worst movie of the year, or decade, or whatever; certainly it isn't a Great Movie either. Maybe it's even not-that-great of a movie, but those people aren't seeing everything that comes out. They might be vaguely aware, at the time it was released, that Gods of Egypt IS a movie, but of course they didn't see it. They just don't know how wide the gamut is. That 7/10 is the best movie you've ever seen and that 4/10 is the worst, but listen: the scale is from 1 to 10. Movies get even better. And so, so much worse.

Set List: Googling for Ham

Set List at the Pack is brought to you by googling for pictures of ham!

I can't explain how, exactly. It just is. The show wouldn't be the same without it.  Look at those hams. Just look at them.

Escape Room Reviews: The Diner

Company: Quicksand Escape
Room: The Diner
Location: San Diego, CA
Date Played: 2/19/17
Player Count: 2, could easily be 4
Success:  Success!

Premise: You’re running with a wild crowd, baby, and if you’re gonna act like a mob goon, you’re gonna have to rob a place now and then.  A place like this diner!

Immersion: This diner looks great! Like a peppermint sundae. Like so many escape rooms, it's set in the past, and nothing weirdly anachronistic is going on here. There are dozens of locks, and by and large the puzzles lean more toward reasonable and real things that could be in this setting to secure items or pass messages, and away from games and puzzles included for their own sake or to make the room longer.

Highlights: I won't say more than this about it, but the end game is super fun and exciting. The puzzling was a good mix of the easily understood that just requires a little elbow grease, and the 'flash of insight' variety that are so satisfying when they click in.

Lowlights: I think when we first stepped out of this one, I was a little bit down about needing a couple of hints. Our most commonly received hint is 'keep going!' Especially in a room with a lot of Spot Hidden challenges like this one, and especially when playing with a very small group. (More eyes means faster finds!) One puzzle that I took point on, I took it in a totally wrong direction until a clue put us back on track. 

And Finally:  Pain is temporary! Those light wounds to the ego pale when I look back over everything The Diner has to offer and how well designed it is. Like a movie that doesn't waste a scene, where everything turns out to be important sooner or later. It's easy to see why this room is so highly ranked in the San Diego area.  Out of 19 games played, this one comes in at #4. 

How to book this room yourself: Visit http://www.quicksandescape.com/the-diner.html

Bat Night 5! This Friday!

It's our special Bat Night show, which is comedy performed in environmentally-friendly Complete Darkness! Starring Chaz Dean and more!

#2,326: Passengers

The Handmaiden - ★★★★☆
I saw this under perfect conditions– in a nice theater, and with no idea of what the movie was about. It's interesting, it's twisty, it goes on and on... and on... Maybe a little bit too far, in fact.

I'm torn between watching the BBC version to get more and never watching the BBC version so that I don't ruin something nice.

Hidden Figures - ★★★½☆
"What was that Kevin Costner movie with Octavia Spencer?"
"Hidden Figures?"
"No. Well... yes. But..."
"Oh, no no, Hidden Figures was the Octavia Spencer movie with Kevin Costner."
"Right."

Rogue One: A Star Wars Story - ★★½☆☆
I've seen this twice and I still didn't catch the names of all of the main characters. That doesn't feel very Star Wars to me. With Episode 7, it was exciting to know that there are new people and new places and new things and we don't know what they all are yet, but we know who the main characters are. The audience around me seemed to care a lot more about the droid than any of the people. I think I'm less angry about it than I sound, but it still seems like such a wasted opportunity to go back to prequeling.

On a second watch, I did feel that mid-movie slow down. I like the ending though! (The ending, particularly, and distinctly from the epilogue.) Even if it takes all movie to get there, it does feel good to have the movie finally make a bold choice.

Also on the rewatch, everything involving Saw Guerrera is completely frustrating. None of it makes a lick of sense. So much of his sequence could be lifted out and nothing would be any different. He doesn't do anything that helps anyone, and then he dies because what? He's bored? He's like the Into The Wild of Star Wars.

Passengers - ★★★★★
I liked this one very much. I felt like the vision of the future resembled the cheerfully unhelpful future I like writing about. I hope this gets the production design Oscar™.

All of the think pieces getting written about Chris Pratt's 'problematic' behavior are like the open mic comic doing his bit about how weird it is that Garfield hates Mondays. Yes. That's not your joke, that's Jim Davis' joke. Also, that behavior is the point of this movie. It's the interesting thing! You were hoping for a movie where two beautiful people randomly pair off and just relax in luxury until they die of old age?

I don't want to see the first half re-edited into a rom-com, but I would like to see a more thoughtful third act that forces them to really get a grip on the situation.