#2,415: Downsizing

Downsizing - ★★½☆☆
Boy, Matt Damon’s having a hard time lately. As soon as Suburbicon came down from that billboard by LACMA that movies only get when they know they’re in trouble, Downsizing went up in its place. And the sheer volume of trailer plays this thing got. Yeesh. I was willing to go see it from the beginning, and then it felt like the studio spent two months trying to talk me out of it with all their terrible ads.

Speaking of, I think this is the big trend in movie trailers this season: making a selling point out of a moment that the script totally thought was going to be a big reveal. It’s like if the trailer for Psycho wasn’t tracking well and then the whole marketing campaign shifted to be focused on the shower scene. Thor: Ragnarok doesn’t lay any hints that the Hulk is coming, because they thought you were going to be so pumped to see him, and Downsizing was planning on surprising you with the fact that Kristin Wiig isn’t going to be in this movie, which is in fact a shaggy dog story about Matt Damon learning that he needed to step away from his old life of taking care of his loved ones and struggling to make ends meet in his career where he improves his clients’ quality of life, so that he can, um, worry about money and help people, but in a way that requires less specialized knowledge? I don’t know. I had fun in the last act of the movie trying to imagine what the actual scale of everything we were seeing would have been.

Molly's Game - ★★★★☆
I was on board just to go see a couple hours of Sorkin dialogue, and of course Jessica Chastain as The Competent Woman. I think it's neat that the movie is in some ways a sequel to the book. I hope they get an Oscar nod for editing, as well as the inevitable screenplay nomination.

As soon as I heard there would be a movie I was wondering how they were going to depict Tobey Macguire.

Star Wars: The Last Jedi - ★★★★☆
Well, first things first, having seen this twice in very different theaters, I’ve come to a conclusion: I think the first reel is out of sync. Like the whole scene with Hux on the bridge / space battle thing. Just a frame or two or three.

Other stuff: (Caution: extensive nerdery ensues)

- I’m surprised at all the ire. It’s a fun cynical thing to say that of course the internet hates things, but I don’t really understand it. It’s everything everyone said they wished The Force Awakens had been.
- I’m so happy about Rey. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become a weird kind of Star Wars elitist about what was intended in the original movie and so I like the Force being for everyone. I’ve read posts from goofs about how Luke already represented the random anykid using the force, which is true, but that was before 30 years of waxy lore buildup.
- You can draw a parallel between the practical necessity of scrubbing the EU and the line about burning down the past, sure, but that’s not what Ren is talking about. Your Star Wars isn’t gone. You’re not actually meant to destroy the past. Why? Well, there’s this little trick that people who have seen a movie before might be able to pass on, which is that the villain is often wrong. Sometimes art is used to explore a wrongheaded idea or philosophy by putting it in the mouth of antagonistic characters.
- I should probably emphasize that this is mainly in reference to ideas, and not like, every word out of the villain’s mouth. (Although, Iago.) There’s a thing about Empire where supposedly younger children were more likely to think Vader was lying to Luke. I know I was in that camp myself. I’m not sure what it says that it’s apparently such a popular opinion that Rey and Ren were lying about her parents. (That said, if any writer was going ever going to try to pull a reversal here, it would be JJ.)
- Canto Bight. Sure, with the hindsight that the plan didn’t work, you can say they might as well not have tried, but the rebellion is all about making these million-to-one shots. They can’t all pay off. Besides which, embodying the theme of the movie is a worthwhile thing to do in a movie. Do people not like Finn? Isn’t ‘seeing what adventures the characters are having’ another part of what folks want from Star Wars stories?
- On the other hand, the ‘how did Finn learn to fly since yesterday’ criticism is probably a valid one. We’re used to a gap of years between movies, but I think we’re only getting days this time.
- If I were snipping a plot thread out of this movie, it would be Captain Phasma. Is she a popular character? It feels like the Disneyiest, merch departmentiest fingerprint on these movies.
- Luke’s apparition. I wanted to say that it was how Luke thinks of himself, but I think the lightsaber is how we know it was meant to freak out Ben. The only reason I can think of for using the blue saber (besides giving the audience a clue) is that Luke is showing he’s met with Rey. The implication that Threepio can see the projection is really something. That means Luke is doing something to (at least) light on another planet, not just influencing the minds of the people there.
- Force ghost Luke! Luke’s hand should have clattered to the ground. Will the ghost have a robot hand? Real hand? No hand? Why isn’t anyone talking about the real issues?
- I would say that Luke did give Rey the most important training he could have. It’s not like he’s going to be drilling her on EU lightsaber forms. He probably doesn’t even know that kind of Republic era Jedi Academy stuff. Like Luke in Empire, what Rey learns in that dark side cave directly informs her approach to the force and evil and the rest of the movie.
- I wonder if audiences would gasp at Leia getting spaced if Carrie Fisher were alive. Maybe since they know the actress is gone, they’re just waiting for Leia to go somehow. I definitely thought it was possible her shuttle would be shot down until Poe boarded the same one.
- You just know they’re going to jam those dice into SOLO.
- I still like this movie. I liked it more this time.

Every hour of 2017

I saw this thing online last year where some guy kept track of how he spent every hour of 2016. So I gave it a try.

I expected that keeping track would make me more accountable to my time. It did not. I did find it helpful to see what I was doing on a given day, and it's both more convenient and less cumbersome than leafing through a diary to see what I was up to. Still, my logging tapered off until I gave up sometime in October for no reason.

View fullsize

Click to view the thing in the thing with the thing!

My version of the chart also includes notes on what TV show or movie or game or book I was consuming, or what project or job I was working on. Your version is just a broad strokes of my year. Each color represents a kind of activity. To wit:

• Sleep
• Media Consumption (TV, Movies, Podcasts if that was mostly what I was doing, comics, probably some light reading)
• Comedy (performing or producing)
• Work (for others, for money)
• Wasted Time (mostly involving the internet)
• Family
• Gaming (video games, board games, room escapes, that sort of thing)
• Books (a maligned category that wasn't distinct enough from Media)
• Productive (work on personal projects, errands, exercise, cleaning, etc)
• Social Events not covered by the above
• Other (originally code for 'can't remember', eventually code for 'didn't bother')
• Time Travel (mostly through zones)

Escape Room Reviews: Black & White

Company: Escape Room Cleveland
Room: Black & White
Date Played: 12/27/17
Player Count: 3
Success:  Success!

Premise: You’re trapped in an escape room where everything is black and white.

Immersion: This escape room looked just like an escape room. Except that there was no ceiling. Escape Room Cleveland feels a little like a science fair, booths set up in a gymnasium. You can hear people talking (or frantically yelling) in the other rooms, although once we got down to business, it wasn’t much of a distraction. 

Highlights: This is a very puzzle-y room. ERC’s hardest, according to one employee. I was happy that an object I thought was useless decoration turned out to have a valuable purpose. 

Lowlights: Very little in the way of wonder or delight. This is a workmanlike room focused on a series of tasks. A few too many of those tasks are pen-and-paper, activity book types of puzzles. One prop was broken and we didn’t interact with it correctly until prompted by the GM. The big uncomfortable futon actually is useless decoration.

And Finally:  If you’re into some heavy puzzling (like we are), this room will scratch that itch. I think I’d have a hard time recommending it to non-enthusiasts though. I want to be clear that I didn’t -dislike- this room, just that there are better games out there, so out of 41 games played, I’m ranking this one at #29

How to book this room yourself: Visit https://www.escaperoomclev.com/black-and-white-2/

Kickstarter Monday: Failure Edition

You know what’s a good way to start a new year? By reflecting on failure! I’m not going to tell you I always bet on the winning horse. This month, let’s check out some of the Kickstarter projects I wanted to back, but not enough to make 'em happen.

It’s a Month Giant Calendar - It’s just a big wall calendar. I don’t really like those, but this one appealed to me and almost 200 other people. Maybe $26k was too big of an ask. 

The Lost Skeleton Walks Among Us - Larry Blamire is the writer, director, and co-star of a series of wonderful pastiche comedies in the style of 50s b-movies. I’d love for him to be able to make more. Maybe $410k was too big of an ask.

Mutant League Football - a silly football game for the Sega Genesis was up for a remake a couple of years ago. I probably backed out of nostalgia. Maybe $750k was too big of an ask. 
(I think they ended up making the game anyway, but I haven’t played it.)

That’s Not Funny - This was a documentary about comedy. I have no idea why I would have backed it. Looking at the page now, I see that some people I know were interviewed. Maybe they filmed a little bit at an open mic I used to go to or something. All I really know about it now is that a) they sent out so much email and b) $50k was definitely too big of an ask. So they did that really suspicious thing where they restart the project for a tiny fraction of the original budget. Having only raised $30k, the second project set a goal of $15k instead of 50k. And it raised...$15k.

This is the third scummiest move you can do in crowdfunding, after faking a disease or having anything to do with indiegogo.

Not Art Issue 6 Cover Sketch

So it turns out our time-to-crate in this story was about 6 months. That's not too bad. Plus, not to give anything away, but nobody in this issue steals 40 pies. That would be terrible.

What does happen this month? You'll have to get your hands on an issue to find out, and the best way to do that is by having it mailed right to your home. You know, like subscribers do. However, I have a growing contingent of 'newsstand' customers, who like receiving their regular issues in person. 1/5th of each newly printed issue is already spoken for. Get yours today!