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Not a front for a secret organization.
Written by Rob Schultz (human).

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What's neighborly?

Ceteris Paribus. Which is to say, all else being equal, if you're some economist or guy who likes to make arguments based on inconvenient terminology (like an economist).  All else being equal, I prefered "can only sleep with the TV set to maximum volume" guy to "vomiting out a window or perhaps off a balcony" guy, as neighbors go.  

Or so I thought.  VOAW(OPOAB)-guy has been going for about 12 hours now, which has taken on comic proportions, even if the scream while vomiting and a second later, the splash of said vomit isn't any less horrible than it was last night. 

And on that note, please allow me to introduce you to a short post written on Oct 12, 2008, that never got past the draft button:

This might be a difference of living in the city vs. the suburbs, but when I was growing up, if the kids down the street were screaming their heads off, it was part of whatever game they were playing, and you ignored it.

Not the case at a friend's house a few months ago, in a fairly suburban corner of LA, when the neighbor kid started screaming his head off.  Our host dropped everything to go to the back yard and yell 'are you okay?' for a little while, and then went around to go knock at the neighbor's door and see how things were going. Seemed strange, but only to a few of us.  To the rest, we seemed monstrous for being inclined to ignore it.

But what happens when max-volume-TV-neighbor can go to bed and leave some horror movie on, with a woman in distress screaming "HELP ME! HELP ME PLEASE! SOMEBODY! SOMEBODY HELP!" at 2 am?  What's neighborly then?

Maybe the thing to do is to just let one of the other neighbors take care of it.  Relying on 'someone else' to call the cops, or to put out that fire, or to cure cancer is typically a recipe for disaster, but we can rest assured that one nearby neighbor is on the case.  Angry-yelling-out-the-window-guy moved in somewhere around here lately, and I like him.

The family with the new baby does a pretty good job, and the baby doesn't cry very often, but when it does, angry-window-yelling-guy is on top of it.  Someone's gotta tell that baby to shut up, after all, or it'll never stop crying!  He makes me feel like I live in a movie about New York in the 1970s.  There're two girls fighting about something right now, about 1:30am, and angry-guy set 'em straight: "You're both assholes," proclaims he, "now shut up!"

In which this page's subtitle is made reality, in the third person.

Current Rob (Producing) is working on the SpikeTV show, has a feature coming up in June that could maybe shoot RED, and is making daily visible progress on the new radio show.  It's visible because there's a google doc spreadsheet with delightful color coding to keep track.  It's like this right now:


Current Rob (Consuming) is up to movie #1,452, and the recent lot is made up of some poor documentaries, a bunch of shorts of varying quality (including one he worked on in early 2006, which recently won a prize), and a couple of others.  Role Models, for instance, was much more David Wain-like than reviews may have led one to believe, and whilst editing a UCB video starring an actor with a supporting role in the film, Rob's worlds collided just a little bit.

Hanging around the LA comedy thing has begun the odd but not unpleasant phenomenon of Rob seeing folks he knows in a lot of movies and tv and things lately.  Not to mention in some old conan bits that high school Rob sure enjoyed.

Speaking of, High school Rob is attending the St. Rita's Youth Group Retreat Retreat, which is a planning session for the big 90-kid event weekend to be thrown at the end of the school year.  On Saturday evening, Catholic mass is said.  At the end of the first of two halves that make up the ceremony, the Liturgy of the Word, is the General Intercessions - a series of foci for which the congregation may direct their prayers - common subjects include world leaders, that their decisions may bring peace and harmony to the world; this retreat team, that they might receive guidance to achieve their task; St. Rita, St. Mark, and all the saints; ailing and recently departed relatives or members of the community, that they may be healed or find eternal peace (respectively); and in as small a service as the one being held, individual people or causes on the minds of the group.  High school Rob contributes "stuntmen, daredevils, and people attempting to break or lay claim to especially dangerous world records who jeopardize their lives on a regular basis."  The priest struggles not to giggle and apologizes later in the evening, just in case Rob was serious and maybe knew such a person.  He did not, but played the whole thing very straight, as one must.

Wrong holiday.

As I recall, and can piece together from historical fact. I got the NES title Dragon Warrior for Christmas 1989. My dad and I played that one together a lot, and more accurately, he completed the game and I watched. Fair enough, I may have been too young to properly grasp everything going on in there anyhow. On New Year's Day, I recall us spending the entire day down in the basement, where the NES lived, chipping away at that game. At least all during the day up until dinner, which was a turkey-and-all-the-trimmings kind of spread, which my mom cooked while she watched the Macy's parade and we hid out in the basement, hitting slimes with a stick, hoping to earn enough money for a copper sword in case a wolfman showed up on our way to Ridmular for keys.

Anyhow, just thinking of that. I hope everyone's having a SpooooOOOooky ThaaaaAanksgiiiviing!